this is a re-issue... i once asked by a friend of mine on how long did chuck (my boyfriend) courted me? Then it occured to me that, though in our culture, courtship is something important, i realized that chuck never did court me. that minute i re-asses why did my boyfriend for seven years did not court me? was i that aggressive? am i sending 'wrong' kind of messages towards the male species? After a few minutes i figured out that it's been so long since i was single that i already forgotten the principles i am living for when i was in the 'dating arena'.
one funny thing that i remembered back then is the issue on 'ligaw', once there was a friend of mine who labels her self as somebody 'mega conservative' so conservative that she let's a guy court her for 4 years (all through out our college years) and that includes the common dating rituals (eg. hatid sa bahay, sundo sa bahay, libreng lunch, snack, minsan pati barkada niya, flowers, chocolates and of course tons and tons of 'papuri' form the guy like ang ganda mo, bagay sa iyo earrings mo and the likes). finally i had the perfect oppurtunity to ask her why that long? why four years? and then she answered with out blinking 'because we want to get to know each other'.
yeah right! like that's gonna happen! hah! get to know each other better, come on! that is the most hillarious statement i have heard that year. let's try to disect this matter so that we can understand it better.
point number one.
'ligaw' literally means ligaw, mislead. every guy you know will mislead you on this stage because he would only put his best foot forward so that you would give your 'matamis na oo'. it's like allowing him to lure you. hah! talik about submission. point number two.
flowers. flowers. more flowers! i asked a couple of people what does flowers mean? what does it signify? they said it represents sweetness, love and the best part is the color and the type of flower has meanings too. if you try to disect this you would ask your self, is there a book that contains all of this? like da vinci code or something? now here is my wrath, flowers are the reproductive organs of all plants. if that is the case men are giving the women they claim to love or like 'vaginas' of plants. iw. point number three.
chocolates! who doesn't want it? but the thing is chocolates has endorphines or happy hormones that takes effect when you eat it. *thesame reason why when your sad people would advice you to eat choco ice cream so that you will feel good) so, while eating you will be thinking of the guy who gave it to you, thus, you will feel good about the guy. shucks!
now, you question me on what to ask for a guy? nothing. women are intelligent. we don't have to be lured into relationships. don't even begin to think that i am cheap (and so what if i am?), it is just that i truly believe that if the guy was delivered by christ into your life, no amount of luring, no type/kind or color of flower, no brand of chocolate is needed to prove to a woman that you will do her good, that she will grow in all aspects of her life and that you will walk hand and hand in spreading God's words. why settle for somebody who is presently there when you can have somebody who has the 'best quality'. and don't even begin to tell me that is impossible, it is not, with god nothing is impossible.
